Different Partners Same Tools

**closetfrek** · 06-04-2003, 10:31 AM

How do you feel when you know that your butch/femme has used what you two use in bed on someone else before? Does it bother you? Do you absolutely refused to let it happen? What are your views on it?

**Princess2003** · 06-04-2003, 10:36 AM

I don't like the idea of using the same tools...mainly because you never know what's growing on them

I asked my butch to sterilize them...hy did...I would have preferred to go shopping together and pick out our own selection...it just didn't happen that way...I mean hys vibrator must be from the 1940's or something...it's got to go...planning a trip to SF soon to get an upgrade

**closetfrek** · 06-04-2003, 10:49 AM

Personally I don't like the idea of using anything that has been with someone else. .even when it came to restraints all I could think about was some other femme was cuffed in these. Maybe it's something I should just get over. .like with strap-ons. .I really hate the idea of it being used with someone else. .even though it gets wrapped. I dunno. .*shrugs*. .I just don't like it. .maybe someone can shed some light and help me understand what some of these butches are trying to convey when they explain why they don't feel the need to buy another.

**petitedrag** · 06-04-2003, 10:50 AM

i refuse to use "recycled" tootbrush, undies, and tools

**Princess2003** · 06-04-2003, 11:01 AM

i am so glad i am not the only one who felt a little weirded out...got to sterilize and/or whip out the wallet...i mean, i found a pic of my guy and one of hys ex's using the same cock we use...(hy sterilized it)...i cringed inside...hy didn't think it was a big deal...i don't know...for me, it's just weird...it doesn't feel right...and i'm pretty mellow...

**Alisha_Love** · 06-04-2003, 11:13 AM

I think thats nasty.

I could care less if a butch is attached to it or not, its going in the trash if its been used on anyone else. With new relationships come new "Tools" - Why would I want something used on me thats been all up and IN someone else..ew.

Alisha

**closetfrek** · 06-04-2003, 11:21 AM

I can see I'm not the only one that has a problem with this. .and here I thought I was being difficult . .*getting her sign up. ."New tool or no sex". .*

**Medusa** · 06-04-2003, 11:21 AM

Alisha---I agree...its the EWWWW factor.

I would totally refuse to let anyone use a tool that was already "christened" by someone else.
It seems disrespectful to me.

**audacious1** · 06-04-2003, 11:24 AM

Hell no. The great thing about NOT being a bio male, is that each new partner gets to break me in all over again (heh).

closetfrek, I have NO idea what any butch unwilling to buy a new cock could possibly be trying to convey, except that they are cheap bastards. As far as getting attached...um hello? That is fucking stupid. Buy three identical ones, and open as needed if you fear your "model" will go out of production. I am strongly cock identified, but it would be asinine of me to pretend I do not have to purchase my delightful, delectable appendage. I suppose if you are a non-monogamous player, then there is little choice but to wrap and "sterilize." In this case, I would at least hope that if there is a primary partner, then she gets a special reserve cock.

Princess, regarding that pic...*shudder*...unless it was a turn-on I am sorry you had to see that. Quality cocks are costly, no doubt, running between $60 - 80, but I have never been with a woman that was not worth spending AT least that much money on. I always order a fresh supply of lube, as well. First for hygiene reasons, second out of respect. I mean, think about it...the hand that touches the lube touches all sorts of "other stuff."

~Thank you for tuning into aud's cock talk~

**princesszoe** · 06-04-2003, 11:53 AM

Oh Hell No! I 'm not using anything somebody else used....no way no how!

closetfrek...I feel the same way about restraints, floggers, paddles...if it was used on someone else, I do not want it used on me.

Stephanie

**~femme~** · 06-04-2003, 12:20 PM

I really do not like the idea of recycled tools. I have in the past begrudgingly, but only after it was sterilized and with a condom on it.

EWWWWW for used tools here too

**Graham** · 06-04-2003, 12:56 PM

What if they belong to the femme?

**BadBabyGrrl** · 06-04-2003, 01:11 PM

YUCK

**Kai** · 06-04-2003, 01:36 PM

Originally posted by Alisha_Love
I think thats nasty.

I could care less if a butch is attached to it or not, its going in the trash if its been used on anyone else. With new relationships come new "Tools" - Why would I want something used on me thats been all up and IN someone else..ew.

Alisha

I agree 100% OH HELL NO!!!!!!

Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!

**Kai** · 06-04-2003, 01:53 PM

Originally posted by Medusa
Alisha---I agree...its the EWWWW factor.

I would totally refuse to let anyone use a tool that was already "christened" by someone else.
It seems disrespectful to me.

Yep, that also....

**Princess2003** · 06-04-2003, 02:04 PM

i now have faith in the fact that i am not a prude...lol

**princesszoe** · 06-04-2003, 02:05 PM

You're no prude honey...just making sure you stay healthy too. There's no reason not to have your own *stuff*. Plus, its just the ick factor of it..knowing somebody else had it inside them. ICK!

**FemmeBabyGrrl** · 06-04-2003, 02:31 PM

Wow, don't I feel different now

I don't mind using the same dildos as hy's had for a while. I mean, usually the butches I've been with are pretty attached to one particular cock.

Besides, I always use condoms.

And besides that, what if it's just for sex or we break up a week later. Is hy supposed to go get new dicks everytime hy has sex?

If it was a sanitary issue, that would be one thing. But this seems like a personal preference or mind issue.

Hmm, maybe after a year or so, or once we've moved in together, then new cocks are in order.

**Medusa** · 06-04-2003, 02:41 PM

FBG--Im all about condoms too....now THAT is a comfort issue! LOL!
I guess it is a mind issue...my mind SCREAMS to think of using the same cock..

I wonder if bio men were able to get a new one every time, if they would...

**XXX** · 06-04-2003, 02:56 PM

Well you do realize that you don't go buy a whole new body every time you give some ---- up.(unless you are with a virgin facts are some1 else's germs have been there )..and there's alot more germs being recycled with unprotected oral then with old toys that have been used w/ condoms and sterilized between sex partners.

The EWWW factor 4 me is when I think of some1 that has no respect 4 themselves and lacks total sense of STD awareness and sexual responiblity.

However other then my cuffs I make it a personal rule new g/f new toys 4 our sex toy box-new cock/s 4 my strapon..

**musicfemme** · 06-04-2003, 03:15 PM

I have to say that for me, it is completely a mind issue. I totally understand the condom thing, and what XXX said about unprotected oral being way more germy in reality than a toy that has been sterilized. But the idea STILL grosses me out. And I figure, it's easy enough to go out and buy a new cock. So why not just do it? I could probably get past it temporarily if it was a casual thing and just use condoms, but I would really prefer if I'm going to be with someone a while that we invest in new toys.

**Eve** · 06-04-2003, 03:16 PM

Shite. Since I like fisting so much, I guess I should require that anyone I date get a whole new hand?

*snort*

Voting for the "don't mind so long as STD protocol is being followed" side of things.

~Eve

**Toughy** · 06-04-2003, 03:39 PM

if its been in someone else you don't want it in you????????????

those of you who fucked bio-men.......did you want them to cut off
their bio-penis and buy a new one with each girlfriend? What about FtM's who get phalloplasty???

that means I would have to cut out my tongue and cut off both my hands at about 2 inches above the wrist and both my big toes....well maybe all my toes.....laughing.....

AND if you are at all sexually active...........dang that means I would have had to buy STOCK in toy stores.........christ....trying to think how many cocks (and hands and tongues) I would have to had bought in the last 30 years..............good goddesss ...... hell just how much money I would have to have spent in the last 4 years is scary.....

I prefer washing the damn things and using gloves or condoms unless I am fluid bonded......

**Kai** · 06-04-2003, 03:43 PM

Guess that is why I am a prude.. I don't do casual sex. It's just SO not me...

Guess that is why only 3 bio males, two were husbands... And lord if they could have gotten new ones I would have been one happy butt camper....

God am I a prude or what?? LOL

Don't answer that...

**FemmeBabyGrrl** · 06-04-2003, 03:47 PM

What about the bed? Does it creep you out to think that your butch or femme has had sex with others in it?

**petitedrag** · 06-04-2003, 03:50 PM

you mean those hotel beds aren't new?

**Heart** · 06-04-2003, 03:55 PM

I remember going to a play party once and seeing my ex using a small red flogger that we had shopped for and bought together on someone else. I just couldn't understand how she could use it on someone else and not think of MEEEEEE... but that was my problem, not hers - lol.

I don't seem to have any trouble enjoying my lovers' tools even knowing that someone else has enjoyed them too. Afterall, these items are costly. I don't have an "eww" response to previously-used cocks as long as they're well-cared for, but I can understand it. It's an emotional thing, not a logical thing.

And I do adore those shopping trips to Toys-in-Babeland when you're just creaming your panties while getting some new tois with your boi... *g*

Heart

**Eve** · 06-04-2003, 04:00 PM

[thread meander]
(((Heart)))) Miss you!
[/thread meander]

~Eve

**Needlegirl** · 06-04-2003, 04:08 PM

my (somewhat warped) mindset:

if it's a one nighter or fling, i really can't ask the person to go out adn get new toys, can i? though usually in those circumstances i refrain from the cock and stick to gloves and a dental barrier. ^.^ but i suppose if a cock MUST be involved i'd opt for some heavy sterilization and a condom.

if we're entering a secure relationship: hell yah i want my own dicks, dammit! it makes me feel all special when i get to pick the size that fits ME. ^.^ i'm also one jealous bitch when in a relationship, so i do tend to cringe at the thought of my boi's past girlfriend shopping for the dick that's being used on me.

if /I/ bought the dick and we used it, when we break up IT'S MINE. i'd hate to think of the femme that snatched my last butches are using MY TOYS. ugh.

some toys i'm leery of sharing, but won't be as irked by the use of them on me: cuffs, leg spreader bars, blindfolds, and belts.

floggers, whips, needles, knives, and other toys that may carry blood or sexual fluid = oogie.

<3needle.

**TmanSpenc** · 06-04-2003, 04:24 PM

It's always clean. It's always wrapped. It's MINE. I picked it out becuase it's how I see myself. I don't go shopping with my femme for her to pick out my cock. It's MINE. I don't buy a new one for every partner because it's MINE. It comes with me. If you want to sleep with me, you sleep with my cock.

Tman *very attached to his cock*

**Princess2003** · 06-04-2003, 04:36 PM

but as far as the men vs. toy thing goes: the material that toys of made of breed all kinds of shit..this festering is only enhanced by the moisture from vaginal juices and saliva...a man can take a shower...of course a condom would be necessary too...plastic etc. is a bit different than an actual digit connected to someone's body(live and breathing and once again in most cases permanently attached w/o the option of a snap on alternative)...i think it's pretty easy to go and buy a new cock if you're engaging in regular sex with the same person...because with time (at least in my case) we don't always use condoms...so steriliztion is definitely necessary if the purchasing of a new one is not an option...as far as the bed goes etc: if hy fucked someone I'd want to change the sheets...but the bed itself is not an issue (even though it too breeds all kind of bacteria)...for some reason that one doesn't bother me...if i were having a one night stand the old cock is cool, but it would need to be protected...washed well with anti-bacterial soap...when i care about someone and am in a relationship w/ them than it just seems more comfy to get our own dick (s) together...i guess it is a total mind thing...i am not a clean freak but it just seems like more of a respect thing in a relationship...my two cents..

**copper_belle** · 06-04-2003, 04:42 PM

I recognize that you wouldn't expect a man to cut off his penis after having been with other women... and so that should mean that ABU toys should be okay...

But I'm with the others that claim mental distress over being fucked with the same cock that someone else may have helped pick out and/or been fucked with...

I guess it's different if it's something that my partner considers part of themselves... but if it's not, knowing that it was purchased with a particular other or even with that particular other in mind kind of fucks with me... mentally... which has a lot to do with how much I'm going to enjoy the experience.

I've never had anyone buy anything new for/with me... that's not true - my ex and i shopped, and bought, but she was never interested in using it with me (what?)...

I haven't demanded that my new partner go buy something new, even though I know her tool was purchased with someone else in mind... suprisingly it hasn't bothered me so much... maybe because the sex is so good

but i do think about it from time to time and it makes me wrinkle up my nose a little bit.

maybe it would be different if it was just something that was pre-existing to past relationships... something completely personal and part of the person like Tman explained... i don't know.

The bed thing gets to me, though, sometimes too. Suprisingly enough I'm not a mental case... at least I don't think I am

I guess at the end of the day, I have to recognize that it's not as important as how I'm treated and the intimacy that we experience... and that it's safe.

**Alisha_Love** · 06-04-2003, 06:44 PM

Originally posted by Kai
Guess that is why I am a prude.. I don't do casual sex. It's just SO not me...

Guess that is why only 3 bio males, two were husbands... And lord if they could have gotten new ones I would have been one happy butt camper....

God am I a prude or what?? LOL

Don't answer that...

ROTFLMAO!!!!

You are too much!

Alisha

**closetfrek** · 06-04-2003, 06:49 PM

I also think about the another in the bed thing. .I thought maybe I was just thinking too much into the past. .but then maybe I am.

I can understand not getting a new tool kinda if it's just casual sex but if it's a relationship then.. .yeh. .ur def getting a new tool. I'm not going to use something picked out for another woman.

I want something that fits my body. If the butch feels the need by all means she can still pick it out herself with hints to what I prefer.

I can understand where some of the butches that aren't willing to buy a new one come from. But on the same token I guess I would want hym to think I'm special enuff to make me comfortable with our sexual practices. When you think about it. .cocks are a dime a dozen. .it's not like you can't go to the store and buy the same one and bond with that one as well.

**Alisha_Love** · 06-04-2003, 06:51 PM

And one thing Id like to add:

I understand how there are some butches that feel as if their strappy/cock is their own, and thats all well and good..
BUT a comparison cant be made btwn a "butch cock" and a bio male's cock..

No matter how much you feel as if its yours, its not the same as a man's and you do have a choice of buying a new one whereas a man doesnt..so I think there's a bit of a difference here.

*I hope noone gets a heart attack over that, but its MY opinion afterall*..

Of course everyone should practice safe sex (God I hope everyone is) - I myself answered the question from the angle of my "emotional side" - it would bother me if I was being sexed with something that was used on someone else.

I am not the type to have casual sex whatsoever. Whoever does get a slice of this is a person that Im in a relationship with, and they only get a slice AFTER tests are done and all that. Im careful with my health..Its important to me. Im not into the casual sex thing - its just not me. So tossin a condom on a strappy is not going to fly with me..I dont PLAY recycled strappy/cock or anything else for that matter. Its a matter of respect.

You want THIS enough - than make a trip to the store and *make it happen!*

LOL
Alisha
*Who has probably offended everyone on this site but doesnt really mean to. Honest.

**TexasCowboi** · 06-04-2003, 07:30 PM

There are some things ya just dont recycle..... and cocks are one of them......

Just My two cents worth of opinion there.......

**XXX** · 06-04-2003, 10:56 PM

My cock is all about my femme's pleasure and soo therefor 1 of the great benefits of butch cock vs biomale cock is my femme gets 2 pick it and she gets that new car feeling of being the 1st 2 ride it..

Yes maybe during my single days of casual sex I had my own collection of cocks that were recylced and sterilized regularly cuz generally that was my form of preffered safe sex practice and investing in new cocks every week or so would have been more costly then the dates I actually went on not 2 mention the paycheck then that I made, but when those dayz ended soo did my desire 2 keep them as memories...and soo my exes got thier own collections that went out the door when they did.

My ex swears she threw it all away however I have this strange feeling she didn't that kinda creeps me cuz she wanted them back soo badly after I told her I was throwing them out, but the way I see it good if she lied and still has it somewhere cuz I know 4 a fact her new g/f is soo anti strapon that a) she wouldn't know what 2 do with it b) it probably would freak her out , but other then that I could care less.

I am very fond of my new cocks and if only I could wish back my virginity 2 give 2 my g/f I would 2...cuz I also cringe 2 when I think about any1 else who didn't/couldn't possibly love her as much as I do or any1 who isn't/wasn't me having anything sexual 2 do with her, but hey I comfront myself with the fact her past reflects the highly sexual seductive women I love and lust and like her I have a past of my own that has made me the highly sexual person who I am..and such. I'm just glad we have a fresh start w/each other and soo why some brothers/sisters feel the need 2 hold on to old toys/cocks when starting a new relationships is beyound me.

**CalifBadBoy03** · 06-05-2003, 12:38 AM

Not only is it nasty to bring used "tools" into a new relationship but totally disrespectful to a "new" partner.....There is no way in hell I would do something like that....

**beeshnarob** · 06-05-2003, 04:16 AM

Though it's not the popular opinion... I happen to agree with Toughy... (my goodness, did I type that? lol)

It's all in the mind... get over it and rock on with your cock on! (wrapped, of course)

Originally posted by Toughy
if its been in someone else you don't want it in you????????????

those of you who fucked bio-men.......did you want them to cut off
their bio-penis and buy a new one with each girlfriend? What about FtM's who get phalloplasty???

that means I would have to cut out my tongue and cut off both my hands at about 2 inches above the wrist and both my big toes....well maybe all my toes.....laughing.....

AND if you are at all sexually active...........dang that means I would have had to buy STOCK in toy stores.........christ....trying to think how many cocks (and hands and tongues) I would have to had bought in the last 30 years..............good goddesss ...... hell just how much money I would have to have spent in the last 4 years is scary.....

I prefer washing the damn things and using gloves or condoms unless I am fluid bonded......

**Heart** · 06-05-2003, 05:18 AM

Huh. I think one could refrain from using words like "nasty" and "disrespectful" in regards to how others might view this situation.

As for bio-cock vs. butch-cock: yup, they are totally different.
Maybe bio-men should forgo using their bio-equippment and start investing in silicone for each new partner they have.

Heart

Thread: Different Partners Same Tools

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Different Partners Same Tools

hmmm

NO!

recycled tools

hmmmm

thank you

recycled tools=gross

beds?

a lot of good points

hmmm

Great Topic!

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