Femme Fun House

**Firedance** · 05-08-2011, 06:40 PM

For all my Femme Sista's!

We obviously need our own little corner of the net to Femme up. So come on in, add your own special Femme touch, from flowers to home improvement projects.

Stay, and chat, have fun, be silly, or just bask in the presence of other Femme's knowing that,
"We get each other".

This is where we can come and support each other in all our glorious Femme diversity.

**Firedance** · 05-08-2011, 06:52 PM

In the spirit of welcoming everyone, I'm going to start off with the front door.
It is already beautifully carved thick wood with a vine growing up it's height, but it needs to be gold.
I've got some Gold Foil, a tiny hammer, time, and a bottle of wine.

I picked up this little plaque today...
It's getting installed just above the doorbell.

"Give me your tired, your poor,

Your Femmes yearning to breathe free,

The glorious, "otherness" of your teeming shore.

Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,

I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"

Welcome Sisters!

**persiphone** · 05-08-2011, 07:06 PM

*moves the wine cooler in*
*lounges nakey*

**Hardline** · 05-08-2011, 07:17 PM

Pulls up in my Ford F-250 pickup towing a trailer with a perfectly confirmed Holstein bull.Parking strategically in front of the windows effectively blocking the view of Persiphones Nakedness.Thinks to myself that between the truck and bull I will be able to keep the boys occupied away from Persi and thus effectively save her virtue....

**dixielady** · 05-08-2011, 07:36 PM

*pulls boots off at the door, flings hat perfectly onto the back of a chair*

*flops down on a sofa*

Hey Persiphone, do we have anything a little harder than wine? It's been a rough day.

**persiphone** · 05-08-2011, 07:41 PM

Originally Posted by Hardline

Pulls up in my Ford F-250 pickup towing a trailer with a perfectly confirmed Holstein bull.Parking strategically in front of the windows effectively blocking the view of Persiphones Nakedness.Thinks to myself that between the truck and bull I will be able to keep the boys occupied away from Persi and thus effectively save her virtue....

*wonders if he plans to ride that bull and contemplates 8 seconds while sipping wine*

**persiphone** · 05-08-2011, 07:43 PM

Originally Posted by dixielady

*pulls boots off at the door, flings hat perfectly onto the back of a chair*

*flops down on a sofa*

Hey Persiphone, do we have anything a little harder than wine? It's been a rough day.

*whips up some spicy bloody mary's and some stiff margaritas cuz i have no idea what the infamous dixie drinks while keeping my eye on that bull out front*

**Hardline** · 05-08-2011, 08:04 PM

I am running out of things to show these guys.They know a beautiful femme is naked there and while no one bucks a Holstein as they are notoriously aggressive,I decide I have no other choice and mount the bulls back in the trailer.Telling the boys when I´m properly roped in here,you all drop the gate and stand back cause this is one rank bull!Man,this is going to be the longest 8 seconds of this cowboys life,but what else can I do when her virtue is at stake...

**Firedance** · 05-08-2011, 08:10 PM

Hey Dixie,
Welcome. There is a fully stocked bar beside the orchids.
What's your poison girl?

And seriously, a Bull? That smell lingers you know!

**dixielady** · 05-08-2011, 08:19 PM

Will take a shot of Cuervo to start.

*Looks out the window, knowing what's gonna happen next*

**Hopelessromantic69** · 05-08-2011, 08:22 PM

I dont think lasting only 8 seconds is going to give you any props in this room..im just saying.

**Chat Daddy** · 05-08-2011, 10:54 PM

starts the clock at 10 seconds and turns it to run backwards, * trying to make it look like * 8 seconds for hard*

**persiphone** · 05-08-2011, 10:54 PM

Originally Posted by Firedance

Hey Dixie,
Welcome. There is a fully stocked bar beside the orchids.
What's your poison girl?

And seriously, a Bull? That smell lingers you know!

yes, but bullshit is excellent for the tomato garden

**dixielady** · 05-08-2011, 10:57 PM

Originally Posted by persiphone

yes, but bullshit is excellent for the tomato garden

bwahahahahaha...if you only knew how well!

**persiphone** · 05-08-2011, 10:58 PM

Originally Posted by Hardline

I am running out of things to show these guys.They know a beautiful femme is naked there and while no one bucks a Holstein as they are notoriously aggressive,I decide I have no other choice and mount the bulls back in the trailer.Telling the boys when I´m properly roped in here,you all drop the gate and stand back cause this is one rank bull!Man,this is going to be the longest 8 seconds of this cowboys life,but what else can I do when her virtue is at stake...

*is on pins and needles waiting for the gate to pop*
*wonders if the bull is gonna lunge right or left*

**persiphone** · 05-08-2011, 11:04 PM

Originally Posted by dixielady

bwahahahahaha...if you only knew how well!

*lines up a few shots of cuervo gold* i say we take bets on this bullride

**dixielady** · 05-08-2011, 11:08 PM

I love a good bet. Too bad I know firsthand this cowboy can ride. lol

**Justin** · 05-08-2011, 11:26 PM

**** Pulls up...whoa there goes the neighborhood !!!

Hello ladies I brought you a few house warming presents

!!!

Fire here is a fresh batch of fleas!!!!

Persi you forgot your lysol......throws you my pamts you may need these !!!!

**wickedlilgrrl** · 05-09-2011, 03:45 AM

*eyes justin and the pressie and runs up grabs the pressie and runs far far far away from the house and back in the dawg's house and throws the pressie through the window and runs back to the femme's fun house all puffed out and sees persi nakie and grabs a silky japanese dressing gown and puts it on over persi shoulder then sees the bull and hardline and smirks then runs gets a red velvet cloth and drapes it over justin's car away from the house* *breathes and slowly walks back to the femme house and slinks down on the couch and whimpers out two words* drink please!!!

**LadyHawkxx** · 05-09-2011, 06:02 AM

Originally Posted by wickedlilgrrl

*eyes justin and the pressie and runs up grabs the pressie and runs far far far away from the house and back in the dawg's house and throws the pressie through the window and runs back to the femme's fun house all puffed out and sees persi nakie and grabs a silky japanese dressing gown and puts it on over persi shoulder then sees the bull and hardline and smirks then runs gets a red velvet cloth and drapes it over justin's car away from the house* *breathes and slowly walks back to the femme house and slinks down on the couch and whimpers out two words* drink please!!!

Watching the chaos unfold at the Femme's new house below, I snap the final few buckles into place and give the newly installed zipline a firm tug thinking to myself...let's do this! Jumping from the treetop platform I zip down to the active house below to assist my young sisters...through the living room where venetian blinds appear in the large bay windows providing privacy, past the "pit" where a cool bottle of peregrino appears in wicked's hand, thru the kitchen where all manner of sparkling and fresh waters appear in the 'fridgerator and out the front door which I pull to gently as I make my exit satisfied that the young femme fatales' now have a chance to set their new house in order without prying eyes or large copious amounts of "bull" left on the new hardwood flooring....

**persiphone** · 05-09-2011, 08:16 AM

LMAO @ you guys

Justin.....you can keep yer flea pamts
dixie....*passes you the salt*

*sends the silky rope up the zipline with Lady*
*tackles wick all nakey in front of the window* let's see if we can distract the cowboy

**Firedance** · 05-09-2011, 11:48 AM

*Fire raises her eyebrow at Wicked, and hands her another drink ... Damn girl, you sure don't sit still do ya? I'm glad your on our side!

*Tips her hat to Lady. Let's make that zip-line installation permeant... it looks useful! Besides, it makes for the very best entrance of ALL time!!!

*Fire accidentally spills peanut oil all over Persi... Oops! That was supposed to be for the onion rings! Silly me!

**Firedance** · 05-09-2011, 01:21 PM

Time to get out my tools and work on a trap door under the front door... something tells me these Butches are going to be a reoccurring problem.

Hmmmm, I think I'll route it so unruly guests land on the compost pile the bull left us. Yeah, that's the plan.

**girlygirl61** · 05-09-2011, 02:45 PM

*walks in loaded with Febreeze, wallpaper samples, fresh flowers, bags of food, bottles of tequila, raspberry vodka, Jack, and Diet Coke* *sniffs air* Damn bois have been in here already! Weeza! I need a drink while I marinate the chicken!

**tymejumper** · 05-09-2011, 04:09 PM

I love to gourmet cook! Anyone marinade the meat? *makes self at home in kitchen and pours self a glass of wine*.

**Firedance** · 05-09-2011, 05:40 PM

Fire peaks her head in the kitchen. mmmMMMMMMmmm smells good! I'm all covered with sweat and sawdust, but the trap door is finished. I put one on the back patio for good measure. I'm going to wash all this saw dust off, mind if I join ya for dinner after?

Oh, the red buttons on the inside of each door are for ejecting pesky visitors that don't mind their manners.

**LadyHawkxx** · 05-09-2011, 06:02 PM

Originally Posted by Firedance

Fire peaks her head in the kitchen. mmmMMMMMMmmm smells good! I'm all covered with sweat and sawdust, but the trap door is finished. I put one on the back patio for good measure. I'm going to wash all this saw dust off, mind if I join ya for dinner after?

Oh, the red buttons on the inside of each door are for ejecting pesky visitors that don't mind their manners.

Smiling to myself admiring the domesticity of the scene before me... places the dozen+ long stem American Beauty Roses with attached "welcome home" card carefully outside the newly marked "trapped door" along with several chilled bottles of dom with a note to Fire thanking her for the incredible job she has done creating this new home for all the femme sisters...and reminding myself to call that chick for a much needed "happy hour" after work... very soon....!

**AngelDreamer** · 05-09-2011, 06:45 PM

*looking in the window and thinking to myself...* Oh my! I go away for a few days and so much changes! How exciting..."

**Firedance** · 05-09-2011, 06:51 PM

Lady, remember that movie we talked about before?

I was thinking our secret password could be, "Walk on the left side!"

I suspect our Femme Sista's might now which movie that is from... I don't think the Butches go for that sort of thing much!

**Firedance** · 05-09-2011, 06:53 PM

Fire see's Angel through the window, squeals, jumps up and drags her darling friend inside.

Hey girl, grab a plate and join us! Tyme is an amazing cook, and Wicked brought plenty for all!

**AngelDreamer** · 05-09-2011, 06:59 PM

*feeling very welcomed and hungry* This is a great idea!

**persiphone** · 05-09-2011, 07:07 PM

*repeatedly presses the red buttons just to be contrary while dripping oil all over the place*

**mmme** · 05-09-2011, 07:16 PM

*peeks in the door, smiling*

Is there room for one more? I'm a Femme, and I have been known to mind my manners.

**Firedance** · 05-09-2011, 07:56 PM

Mmme!
Get your booty in her girl! Of course there is, ALWAYS room for more!

Fire points behind her laughing at Persi...
And the deal is Femmes get to mis-behave... it's the Butches that have to mind their P's and Q's.
So you just come on in and make yourself comfy, and bring along anything that makes you feel at home.

I made Lemon-Blackberry Cupcakes with cream cheese frosting and blackberry garnish for desert. I just picked them out of my garden this morning and wanted to share!
But there is still plenty of food for dinner! And the best part... No clean-up!

**mmme** · 05-09-2011, 08:17 PM

Thank You, Firedance!

My lemon tree has burst full, this year and they are ripe so I can make some lemonade to go with those lovely cupcakes. They smell divine! *saunters in with a basket full of fruit*

Hello, Everyone!!!

**persiphone** · 05-09-2011, 08:59 PM

*showers in the outdoor garden shower with LOTS of suds and a giant sponge*
*sashays in (still nakey) and gives hugs all around for everyone*
*makes lemonade with a little lavender and my vanilla bean sugar*
*shoves 3 cupcakes in my face unceremoniously*

**Bootsandheels** · 05-09-2011, 09:18 PM

Struts in with shitkickers on and fully trained guard dog Aisha (eesha) by my side as always (and who has just had Frontline flea busting juice applied) ...Hey GRRRRLSSSS!!!!! I brought protection!!!! *Grin
Got anything non-alcoholic here? I'm on watch!!!! *pulls up rocking chair on the porch and watches for wily butches while enjoying the beautiful sunset....

**persiphone** · 05-09-2011, 09:22 PM

*pours boots some lemonade garnished with a mint sprig and gives her the itinerary for Seattle pride* gleeeeeeeeeee!!!!

**da Bonster** · 05-09-2011, 10:19 PM

May I present, Wile E. Butch....at yer service ma'am! Dropping low sweeping bow, hat in one hand, a bottle of Dom in the other... I present this offering as a humble supplication to the glorious femmes who make our world go round.

I promise to never smell bad, the wife has thoroughly housebroken me, will always clean my boots, and I spin some mad tracks if ya'll are ever in the mood to shake whatcher mamma's gave ya!

**Bootsandheels** · 05-09-2011, 10:19 PM

Originally Posted by persiphone

*pours boots some lemonade garnished with a mint sprig and gives her the itinerary for Seattle pride* gleeeeeeeeeee!!!!

*Admires Persi's nakey gorgeousness (damn grrrl them legs!!!!

while handing her an organic 100% cotton luxury towel

sips lemonade while perusing itinerary for Seattle Pride...wonders if I can get a sidecar, a butch and a hot bike for me and my dog to ride in dykes on bikes in 1 months' time...what am I thinking? Forget the butch!!! Yells back into house..."Hey!!! Anybody own a bike?".....