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Thread: Hanky Code and Flagging

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    Question Hanky Code and Flagging

    Just a few questions to stir things up !!!!!

    1. Do you think that the Hanky Code is still relevant??

    2. Do you flag?

    3. If so How? and Why??

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    should probably answer my own post so that you do not think that I am stirring the pot just for the thrill of it!!


    1. Yes

    2. Yes

    3. I flag pink and red both left.

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    Talking flagging

    Heyya there,

    I LOVE the hanky code... I love that you can represend what you are into *to a degree* and if you are into giving or recieving.

    I think it is still relevant... now if we could ALL use the same code, not different ones... I use the Gay Boy hanky code, not the one adapted for women, I find that the unadapted one is more widely used *at leasst here in Aus*

    Yes I flag, I flag alot fo colors, but chose 1 or 2 depending on my mood. using the midwest ursine index as a rule, I flag these colors regularly:

    all on left : Black, Red, Hunter Green, LightBlue, Maroon, Tan, Olive,

    and these ones not so often, all on Left: Fuschia, Pink, Rust, dark Pink, Charcoal, Gray, flannel, leopard, houndstooth. I have been known to sling a bootrag out of my back left pocket when looking for a bootblack, or, when in a minimalist mood, yet wanting to convey my likes, either my leather gloves in my back pocket, or a simple leather armband, on my left wrist.

    I flag these to get my point across about what I like, and also they are a good conversation starter in a leather bar. (and very nice to see when someone knows what the color means when they approach you) Also the hankies come in handy as a collar or a gag for someone you meet in a bar *weg* I am proud of my kinks, and am more than willing to show the world some of them by flagging the coded colors that represent them in the hanky code.

    Mister Preston (who needs more pockets, or a card with what he is into printed onto it)
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    HuntrGreen @ Livejournal

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    I also think flagging is a great idea and agree with Mister Preston in using the Gay Boy codes ...

    That being said, I flag Black, Hunter Green and Red on the Left .. I am in to more than that, but dont flag the hankies ..

    But I love Mister Preston's idea of having a card with everything Im in to on it *grin* excellent idea lol

    Sir ShadowWolf

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    The only hanky i HAVE flagged is one that i actually made for myself... it is a hunter green hanky with lace edging (right)... to distinguish a girl looking for a Daddy vs. a boy/boi looking for a Daddy....


    i also own red (right) & black (right), but have not had occasion to wear them out since the "girl" in me tends to override it all..

    if i was to flag EVERYTHING on the aforementioned hanky key that i *could* flag.. hrrm let's see


    black, gray, red, maroon (cutting), light pink, dark pink, purple, fuscia, hunter green (w/lace), houndstooth...(all on the right, of course)

    and probably a few that aren't on that list that i'm missing

    *wondering if i could just make myself a skirt with all those color hankies*
    Last edited by Leathergirlbella; 12-03-2002 at 07:56 PM.

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    Basic Member Heyoka's Avatar
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    Hanky.....

    You have my vote for the skirt, Leathergirlbella... nothing like truth in advertising....

    I believe that the hanky code is still relevant, as there are still times and places when the "radar" is screaming but practical conversation is impossible. The gay guys' code seems to work quite well, it's track record speaks for itself. Too many "contemporary" codes try too hard to be clever and politically correct.

    As for myself... I tend to take the minimalist approach to flagging. One or two (black, or black and red) in the left pocket usually do the trick.

    On the whole, they don't make pockets on pants big enough to flag all the stuff that intrigues me...

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    I thought Id use Mister Preston's list and go thru all of the hankies I would flag were I to have a big enough back pocket lol

    I have sites to 4 lists of hankie codes and each one has its differences .. like the list Mister Preston used (and I used here also) has maroon for blood sports, whereas another list has maroon meaning menstruation ...

    Here's mine:

    Black, Gray, Navy Blue, Red, Maroon, Light Pink, Dark Pink, Purple, Fuschia, Hunter Green, Paisley, White Velvet, Tan, Teddy Bear, Keys in Front, Houndstooth.

    Here are the different sites .. one is one I had, one is the one Mister Preston mentioned (the one I used) and the other 2 are ones my girl found for me ...

    http://slippery.best.vwh.net/hankies.html

    http://www.midwest-ursine.com/hanky.htm

    http://www.sexuality.org/l/bdsm/hanky.html

    http://www.hankycode.com/codeeng.html

    I find the differences a little intriguing .. but seriously frustrating .. I wish we all had one universal list to follow .. but I guess this was if someone doesnt know what Im flagging, it can start a great conversation *smile*

    Sir ShadowWolf

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    Heyya A/all

    I had a friend of mine, that was into military play, put all the hanky colors she would flag onto the medal bar, so rather than tours of duty, it was what she was into. Was just a fantastic idea, and one I am currently putting together for my uniform.

    The most hankys I have put into a pocket at one time was 3, and they were all modified, so as I didn't have a huge lump in my back pocket.

    It is interesting to flag in a lesbian venue, versus a mixed gay bar.. the amount of nights I have been grabbed by a gay man, asking if I know what the colors mean, and once I explained I did, being invited to all kinds of parties...and the sly nod of someone else who is into whatever the color is. * smiles *

    unfortunately there are some kinks that are unflagged... I may have to use my own ideas for those...

    MisterPreston -
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    Uniform

    Ohhh the uniform idea is GREAT!!!!

    and if you were flagging bottom all you would have to do is switch the "fruit salad" to the right and put the other hardware on the left,....

    Oh that just has my mind racing it is such a good idea!! Thanks Preston!!! Please pass along my thanks and compliments to the person who came up with the idea!! I know that I already have plans to go and get supplies to adorn my uniform !!!

    Hurrying to the Army-Navy store after work!!!

    Yes, a femme has to have all the accessories for her uniform fetish too!!

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    Hi there Hobbit......got a question...

    i am not to up on flagging and the terms, but is it only B/bois that flag? Well, maybe i should rephrase that...do femmes flag as well?

    In the south of the USA, i don't see alot of flagging going on, so it is kind of foreign to me. My next question would be, if Ppeople are all using different codes/colors of flags, how in the world would one know what it means? This part is confusing, i could see myself going out and see one carring a pink flag and thinking one thing and it meaning another...whew.....what a mind bender..LOL...

    Thanks....

    sunny~dayzr
    ~"But as I look back at my life, it is easy to see that the times when my wisdom and understanding grew to new levels; those times when I approached becoming the person I long to be; it was always the times that followed negative circumstances." -- Vic Johnson~

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    Good morning, Preston!
    Great suggestion on flagging in uniform! Using a ribbon bar would make it a lot easier to clearly communicate all the various things that you're into. A lot neater than a fistful of hankies. While I usually stick with one or two actual hankies, getting the nine or so things I fancy on a regular basis (LEFT: black, red, grey, maroon, lt. pink, hunter grn., olive drab, gray flannel, leopard, tan) would be a lot easier that way.

    Please pass along my thanks.

    *****

    Hey there, sunny...

    In my experience, flagging is not terribly common, but not unheard of in the south. I have seen more women flagging out here in New Mexico than I ever did in my years in Texas.

    The many and varied hanky codes can be confusing... but, if you go about it with the right mindset, it's actually quite entertaining to be at least a little familiar wirth the more common colors and then go "people watching." It makes for some lively conversation... at least sometimes... 'cause there are times when "a hanky is just a hanky."

    Once I was shown a "Christian Hanky Code" with the various colors and left/right orientations denoting one's belief in certain faiths, miracles, baptism (dunking vs. sprinkling), etc. All I could think at the time was the circus that would ensue if Christian Hanky Code wearers and Midwest Urcine Hanky Code folks all got together in the same place at the same time.

    *****

    I'm sure that F/femmes who flag will be able to tell you how they prefer to do it... but I, for one, have seen many F/femmes flagging... and have often been both surprised and pleased at the cleverness and elegance with which they do it.

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    Femmes and flagging

    i'm a femme.. and i flag....

    (see above post)


    i obviously do not flag ALL the time but when i wear jeans or a skirt with back pockets and it is appropriate.. yes i do..and daytime at leather events does lend itself to jeans and denim-skirt wearing, as do men's leather bars which open themselves to women.


    i also know a girl who kept a pink bunny rabbitin her back pocket along with her hankies i thought that was just COOL... lol

    considering i feel that in some ways i "earned" my hunter green lace -- since i was TOLD to flag it by those i served at the time ...lol.. i do so with much pride.

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    Christian Hankies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Wow. Learn something new every day.

    Hi Heyoka, we're in NM too.
    Spiderlily

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    [QUOTE]if Ppeople are all using different codes/colors of flags, how in the world would one know what it means? This part is confusing, i could see myself going out and see one carring a pink flag and thinking one thing and it meaning another...whew.....what a mind bender..LOL...

    When in doubt ask! At the very least it is a good conversation starter *grin*

    Oh, and Mister Preston ~ I NEVER would have thought to use miliaty ribbons ~ what a great idea!

    Sir ShadowWolf


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    thank You Heyoka...*smiles*

    i was suprised to hear about christian hankies as well...one just never knows, do they*S

    SirShadowWolf....hi there...good to see You*smiles* well i guess You're right, the obvious is to ask..lol...i think i will just have to try that*winks*

    sunny~dayze
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    fun thread....

    I have heard but not seen about the rainbow flag as a hanky
    representing the VERY ODD kink of getting turned on by puking
    on (top) and puked on (bottom)....does this exist??

    RDX

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    The hanky code has been around for a long time. One of the popular explanations was that in the gold rush days there were few women out west in the hills. The miners would still dance and of course, had to dance with each other. The one who was dancing 'the woman's role' wore a hanky to flag that.

    True? I have no idea. It may be one of those quaint legends.

    One that is true is that originally there were few colors to the hanky code. The basics mostly. And then along came a couple of merry pranksters. For a joke they published an outlandish hanky code. They put down the robin's egg blue type colors or the baggie to mean you were into drugs. The really big laugh of this and one totally unexpected was all of a sudden people who didn't know what the original hanky colors were started using their joke code as a real hanky code. And now? People think it has always been a hanky code of dozens of combinations.

    I rarely flag.......people in a leather setting can usually tell I'm a Top after one glance. I'd rather they approach me for conversation than think I'm a menu to be read. If they do, they will find out quickly the types of things I'm into and not into. In return I will get a chance to find out about them.

    Just my opinion. YMMV.

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    Originally posted by R. Daryl Xager
    I have heard but not seen about the rainbow flag as a hanky
    representing the VERY ODD kink of getting turned on by puking
    on (top) and puked on (bottom)....does this exist??
    I have never heard of nor seen this ... I have 2 sites with hanky codes and vomit is on neither of them - sorry

    Hanky codes 1

    Hanky codes 2

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    Honored Member elemental's Avatar
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    Hello,

    I'd like to hear the different ways that femmes are flagging - I don't often wear clothing with pockets when I'm out for the evening.

    I've seen femmes make wrist wraps, but depending on the outfit they are wearing it sometimes doesn't "read" as a flag.

    thanks in advance.

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    when wearing boots that are ankle or higher, i've found that sticking it in the top my boot works.....

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    Back in the Day...

    The following is what I used to flag...

    Always on the left....black, grey, & hunter green...I would just have strip of each hanging out of my pocket if i had more than one..

    Jared...

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    i'm still kind of a newbie so i don't flag much. But when i do i flag geek in the right pocket. For those of you who are unfamilar with the geek flag its a simple pocket protector *big boi grin*

    It all started with someone i know in the Disposable Boy Toys a drag king troup in Santa Barbara. i saw one of the Boys with a pocket protector and he told me he was flagging geek. i thought "what a great idea, geeks need lovin too" so i found a website that sold about six different kinds, bought them and handed them out to all the geeks i know and told them to "flag proud"
    If a computer crashed in the forest....would anyone care?

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    To Me the hanky code is relevant, I like it, and am proud of the back ground it represents.. I look for it when I am out with the boi and proudly wear Mine when around leather folk..

    My preferences..

    Left, Black, Yellow, Magenta, Maroon, Fuschia and one that I don't know if anyone knows about.. Lacey hankey :Victorian scenes, loves to wear that one with the black... *grinz*

    Snow



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    I thought Vomit code was a rainbow colored Hanky?




    How about the dreaded BROWN hanky?


    or the brown hanky with yellow polka-dots.



    Yeah. For someone who likes Scat but only after eating corn.
    "There is but one karma for sycophantic megalomaniacs - to live the life they have created for themselves" - someone smart

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    And the colors are......

    I LOVE the hanky code. I go by the "leather boy scene", not the women's code. I used to work for Mr. S Leather and that's when I started to flag. I still think its dominated by mostly men, which is a bummer.

    I flag on the right always: hunter green, red, blue, gray.....and one time I flagged a swirly lollipop too. I wish there was a color for little girl. I went to a leather gathering in Vegas long ago, and flagged the lollipop.....let me just say most didn't get it, Midori got it...that was great.... She thought outside the box!

    I like that it's a subtle way of saying <as one leans over at the bar exposing the hanky> "this is what I want NOW, if I'm lucky" <grin>.

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    Medusa - You are one sick puppy! Perhaps you should flag with the puppy hanky - little bones all over it.

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    Right : Mint Green
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    <insert clever witicism here>

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    I wish there was a color for little girl. I went to a leather gathering in Vegas long ago, and flagged the lollipop.....let me just say most didn't get it, Midori got it...that was great.... She thought outside the box!


    Excellent idea for the lil girl inuendo, may I suggest a "Hello Kitty" anything.. I've head the idea before...



    ev·o·lu·tion Pronunciation Key (v-lshn, v-) n. A gradual process in which something changes into a different and usually more complex or better form. Ladies and Gents welcome to MY evolution

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    dusa~

    Originally posted by Medusa
    I thought Vomit code was a rainbow colored Hanky?




    How about the dreaded BROWN hanky?


    or the brown hanky with yellow polka-dots.



    Yeah. For someone who likes Scat but only after eating corn.
    i am dying over here..im just trying to picture..

    meows~

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    Ewwwwwwwww...you guys are fuckin gross!!


    DS

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    the really sad/scary part is.. i know a person in real life who has that fantasy (roman showers /vomit) .... shes a major humiliatin pig....

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    Originally posted by Leathergirlbella
    the really sad/scary part is.. i know a person in real life who has that fantasy (roman showers /vomit) .... shes a major humiliatin pig....
    oh dear,
    you might feel scared by other people's fantasies, but why do you feel sad about this?

    toyboy

    flagging black, yellow, grey, hunter-green
    brown hanky hiding in the closet waiting for that special scene
    do what thou wilt

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    the sad part is that those who posted before me were not taking it seriously.... and i know for a fact that it is a real fetish for some...


    the sad part is the way people cant see anything outside their own comfort zone -- i can see it.. and i recognize it.. i fear some of it and flat out dont wanna be near some of it... but i wouldnt ever deny its existence.

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    dear Leathergirlbella,
    thank you very much for the clarifying answer. i'm glad to hear that you respect other people's fetishes. even flagging a yellow hanky provokes lots of comments, some of them expressing disgust, interest or praise for the courage it takes to "advertise" this sexual preference.
    toyboy
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    Question Men's v Women's "acceptable" fetishes

    I hear you toyboy.

    Yet it's really interesting that in the gay Leathermen's community there is a far greater acceptance of both yellow *and* brown hanky flaggers.

    I wonder why that is.
    Objectify me, baby! .

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    Re: Men's v Women's "acceptable" fetishes

    Originally posted by Ms_Vixen


    Yet it's really interesting that in the gay Leathermen's community there is a far greater acceptance of both yellow *and* brown hanky flaggers.

    I wonder why that is.
    i've noticed that to be true, too.

    it may be easier to flag those colors in the gay leathermens' community because perhaps they have participated in those aspects of play more than others...we read it in their erotica and books, and hear of it in the clubs- i haven't seen too many gay men flagging, say, maroon. i'm sure cutting and bloodplay go on in gay male communities, as in leatherdyke communities where it's all the rage, but i think there are some things that override it. and obviously, if they're more exposed to what entails those sorts of things both first and second hand, then those who do probably won't have as much a tendency to think of those kinds of play in its' most extreme form. reading a book or talking to someone can have a long way of educating someone.

    i think one reason why there's more acceptance of yellow and brown in the gay mens' community has a lot to do with the psychology of men. there is much to be said about how men view themselves, especially in relation to other men. you've got that "boys are disgusting," "boys will be boys" theme (which i'm sure all of us have heard in our lives), and boys grow into men, and they think it's funny and pride themselves on the fact that they think they can be really gross and disgusting. now, put a bunch of gay leathermen together and you have that applied psychology multiplied by quite a bit. plus, if they're involved in bar cultures, if the same crowd keeps flocking to the same place, people will get to know each other enough to be able to reach a level where it feels comfortable to flag that and i'm sure that can develop into having no qualms about it at all in the right places. urban aboriginals is a book that has more info on this than i can speak of, really, so that'd be a good source to look into- the full book isn't about yellow and brown but there are specific chapters devoted to those areas of play.

    i've come across a few gay men who've flagged brown and yellow at the same time. thanks to reading mains' book, i had a much better idea of what flagging brown and yellow was, or could be, about.

    i usually go with flagging black, though if the opportunity presents itself, i'll flag yellow with a compatible individual and brown in a negotiated context.

    -ys
    "Life is a bitch, so what do you do, you laugh at yourself and then you get stronger!"

    "You're only as good as your last game."

    "Adversity does not build character, it reveals it."

  36. #36
    Basic Member PaphigleoButch's Avatar
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    Ok, I have not flagged before, but have known of the hanky code for some time... if we are to go by the Ursine list here are my hankies if I were to flag:

    All are left:
    Light Blue
    Robin's Egg Blue
    Navy Blue
    Red
    Light Pink
    Fuscia
    Hunter Green
    Gray Flannel
    Paisley
    White Velvet
    Tan
    Teddy Bear


    Houndstooth (left and right)
    Nick
    I am the stone that the builder refused
    I can't do this all on my own... I'm no Superman.
    My armor, battered but strong. My sword, pitted but razor sharp. My body is bloodied but doesn't know to quit. I am battle-tested and proven, I shall live to fight another day.

  37. #37
    Basic Member spiderlily's Avatar
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    orange FYI

    You know, I just realized that a lot of people are saying that orange on the right means just cruising.

    WARNING: Where I come from, and what I've known as the code for at least 20 years, is that orange on the right means anyone, anything, anytime. And I've known that to be taken advantage of, on the spot, by lesbians, who asked, "Do you know what that hanky means?" When the woman answered, "Yes," it was taken by all present as consent.

    Please consider your boundaries and be explicit in how you express them if you're planning on flagging orange on the right.

    An orange hanky presented to one's top, however, I've always understood to mean full submission to the will of that top. In that format it is a very high honor.
    Spiderlily

  38. #38
    Basic Member quietstrrm's Avatar
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    The most memorable "flag" i've ever seen was a long thin black strap hanging out of a butch pocket that made my knees so weak i was scared to approach her..lol...it was a vanilla bar and at the time i wasn't in the lifestyle, however i frequently don't remember what all the colors mean except the obvious ones and have to refer to someone else's memory or just ask, which can be a wonderful conversation starter

    Sherry

  39. #39
    Basic Member LadySnows_dedicant's Avatar
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    Thumbs up all right

    when Miss allows, i proudly flag on the right black and yellow - folded and presented with precision.

    i too spiderlily have heard the same of orange - i only know it as 'anything goes'

    - cru, House of Snow

    p.s: only You Miss, would think of a hello kitty hanky...shakes my head ever so slightly and smiles.
    strong enough for a Man, made for a Woman

  40. #40
    Basic Member gayla's Avatar
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    I had never really put much thought into orange-left until one fateful weekend in Chicago. My poor friend Eric was out to do anything to anyone and couldn't understand why no one would speak to him. By the time someone was kind enough to enlighten him, he only had a few hours before his flight home!

    I regularly flag black, navy blue and red left. That covers the basics and is usually enough advertising to get the conversation started. On occasion I'll toss in yellow/left also.

    I've seen several girls pin small pieces of hankies to skirts and blouses. I've also seen hankies hanging outta the top of boots, top of thigh highs, outta garters and once wrapped around a barette.

    Gayla

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