Being Attracted To A FTM/ Transguy For The First Time

[PussycatGrrl]

I have created this thread to seek advice from femmes such as myself who are attracted to FTM/ transguys but never used to be. I didnt begin being attracted to FTMs. I have always been attracted to butches and always found FTMs attractive but until now I have never considered a relationship with a transguy. I have started to talk to a FTM recently and we have started to become closer and this is the reason for wanting to understand more from otther like minded femmes.

I would love to hear the thoughts from femmes like myself, who were always attracted to butchs/ TG butches and stone butches but never considered FTMs but who are now attracted to FTMs or who are now in a relationship with an FTM.

Some example questions:

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?

Please do not restrict your posts to answering just these 3 questions as if you have any other thoughts/ advice/ help on this please do not hesitate to post as I really cannot wait for your posts.

:)

[Eva femme]

Enjoy your new found love! (f)

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
A man in a previously female body who you can actually have a conversation with. Fascinating and very attractive. I don't mind about the higher sexdrive because of the testo either. I find transmen very sexy.

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
Never straight, no. Not even bi. I have ID'd as bi for a while but that was before I had ever met transmen. I am a lesbian. With a thing for transmen. I actually can't really wrap my head around it. But it's simply like that and that's fine. I found it very difficult for a while, also because of femme invisibility and all. With a man by my side I would not only 'disappear' as a femme but also as a lesbian. Now I just don't think about it too much. Lesbian with a thing for transmen still suits me best. My Master is gay and we somehow don't look straight together. That helps.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
I am not in a relationship as such. But my Master is a transman. I do feel butterflies for him. I find others attractive too but I am a bit hesitant still. I don't know if I will actually fall in love with a transman to the extent that I would want a relationship. I have no idea. I will simply see who comes my way. Love comes in many forms. It's all good.

Eva

[everest123]

Best of luck in your new relationship!!
Does this prove the point that we as human beings fall in love with the person behind the identity, not the identity behind the person!!
From a butch perspective, I could never be attracted to a man, fellow butch, or transgendered person!! My atraction will always be to femme/women!!
But what works for me , may not work for others!! We are entitled to be with whoever we choose to be with!!
Just my butch two cents worth!!

[PussycatGrrl]

Best of luck in your new relationship!!
Does this prove the point that we as human beings fall in love with the person behind the identity, not the identity behind the person!!
From a butch perspective, I could never be attracted to a man, fellow butch, or transgendered person!! My atraction will always be to femme/women!!
But what works for me , may not work for others!! We are entitled to be with whoever we choose to be with!!
Just my butch two cents worth!!

Thank you so much Everest. Everyone is different. Each to their own but always respect others views as they may be different to your own, which you do :) You are very true in what you say and thank you for your post

[PussycatGrrl]

Enjoy your new found love! (f)

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
A man in a previously female body who you can actually have a conversation with. Fascinating and very attractive. I don't mind about the higher sexdrive because of the testo either. I find transmen very sexy.

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
Never straight, no. Not even bi. I have ID'd as bi for a while but that was before I had ever met transmen. I am a lesbian. With a thing for transmen. I actually can't really wrap my head around it. But it's simply like that and that's fine. I found it very difficult for a while, also because of femme invisibility and all. With a man by my side I would not only 'disappear' as a femme but also as a lesbian. Now I just don't think about it too much. Lesbian with a thing for transmen still suits me best. My Master is gay and we somehow don't look straight together. That helps.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
I am not in a relationship as such. But my Master is a transman. I do feel butterflies for him. I find others attractive too but I am a bit hesitant still. I don't know if I will actually fall in love with a transman to the extent that I would want a relationship. I have no idea. I will simply see who comes my way. Love comes in many forms. It's all good.

Eva




[COLOR="Magenta"]Thank you for your post Eva. You have helped me see things in the correct way.....well you have helped me that is for sure. I see what you mean by not wrapping your head round things still. Maybe i never will either but thinsg are going well at the moment. I guess we will see what happens in time.[

I will never id as straight so I am fine there :)/COLOR]

[MidnightBlueEyes]

I have created this thread to seek advice from femmes such as myself who are attracted to FTM/ transguys but never used to be. I didnt begin being attracted to FTMs. I have always been attracted to butches and always found FTMs attractive but until now I have never considered a relationship with a transguy. I have started to talk to a FTM recently and we have started to become closer and this is the reason for wanting to understand more from otther like minded femmes.

I would love to hear the thoughts from femmes like myself, who were always attracted to butchs/ TG butches and stone butches but never considered FTMs but who are now attracted to FTMs or who are now in a relationship with an FTM.

Some example questions:

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?

Please do not restrict your posts to answering just these 3 questions as if you have any other thoughts/ advice/ help on this please do not hesitate to post as I really cannot wait for your posts.

:)



PussyCatGrrl Thank you so much for starting this thread!!! I am right where you are.. I had never thought that I would be attracted to a FTM not that I was thinking I wouldnt be... just had never had any interataction with anyone FTM... I met my Braedon through the singles thread and am falling very much in love with Him.... He is FTM and that doesnt even phase me... I didnt even think twice which both amazes me and makes me in awe of our relationship...I am very new to understanding FTM and hope to see more insight from femmes who date FTM....


Enjoy your new found love! (f)

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
A man in a previously female body who you can actually have a conversation with. Fascinating and very attractive. I don't mind about the higher sexdrive because of the testo either. I find transmen very sexy.

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
Never straight, no. Not even bi. I have ID'd as bi for a while but that was before I had ever met transmen. I am a lesbian. With a thing for transmen. I actually can't really wrap my head around it. But it's simply like that and that's fine. I found it very difficult for a while, also because of femme invisibility and all. With a man by my side I would not only 'disappear' as a femme but also as a lesbian. Now I just don't think about it too much. Lesbian with a thing for transmen still suits me best. My Master is gay and we somehow don't look straight together. That helps.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
I am not in a relationship as such. But my Master is a transman. I do feel butterflies for him. I find others attractive too but I am a bit hesitant still. I don't know if I will actually fall in love with a transman to the extent that I would want a relationship. I have no idea. I will simply see who comes my way. Love comes in many forms. It's all good.

Eva



Eva, thanks SO much for your insight!! I look forward to talking to you more!!


Best of luck in your new relationship!!
Does this prove the point that we as human beings fall in love with the person behind the identity, not the identity behind the person!!
From a butch perspective, I could never be attracted to a man, fellow butch, or transgendered person!! My atraction will always be to femme/women!!
But what works for me , may not work for others!! We are entitled to be with whoever we choose to be with!!
Just my butch two cents worth!!

Of course my sweet Everest who I adore as Braedon's bro would be posting here.. You are SOO sweet and I am so happy to call you my friend... {definitely couldnt see you attracted to anything other than a femme.... you are so sweet!!}




Thank you so much Everest. Everyone is different. Each to their own but always respect others views as they may be different to your own, which you do :) You are very true in what you say and thank you for your post

Yes Everest is always the gentlewoman... I did say that correctly right Everest? She is a hopeless romantic and I am so happy to know her as my friend... Always respectful..


[color="Magenta"]Thank you for your post Eva. You have helped me see things in the correct way.....well you have helped me that is for sure. I see what you mean by not wrapping your head round things still. Maybe i never will either but thinsg are going well at the moment. I guess we will see what happens in time.[

I will never id as straight so I am fine there :)/COLOR]

Yes I agree with both of you I am not even TRYING to wrap my head around.. I love Braedon for who HE is... thats all that matters to me...

So, my new question to the femmes...what do you find the most different about your FTM on T? Braedon and I have briefly discussed that....

Becca... Braedon's babygirl...

[PussycatGrrl]

[QUOTE=MidnightBlueEyes;3096489]PussyCatGrrl Thank you so much for starting this thread!!! I am right where you are.. I had never thought that I would be attracted to a FTM not that I was thinking I wouldnt be... just had never had any interataction with anyone FTM... I met my Braedon through the singles thread and am falling very much in love with Him.... He is FTM and that doesnt even phase me... I didnt even think twice which both amazes me and makes me in awe of our relationship...I am very new to understanding FTM and hope to see more insight from femmes who date FTM....


You are so welcome Becca. Thank you so much for posting here :) i knwo what you mean......it just kind of happened for me like that too. Not something i expected or planned but it just happened :)

[Annie]

I have created this thread to seek advice from femmes such as myself who are attracted to FTM/ transguys but never used to be. I didnt begin being attracted to FTMs. I have always been attracted to butches and always found FTMs attractive but until now I have never considered a relationship with a transguy. I have started to talk to a FTM recently and we have started to become closer and this is the reason for wanting to understand more from otther like minded femmes.

I would love to hear the thoughts from femmes like myself, who were always attracted to butchs/ TG butches and stone butches but never considered FTMs but who are now attracted to FTMs or who are now in a relationship with an FTM.

Some example questions:

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
I didn't have an attraction before. Never really met (to my knowledge) an FTM before. I knew a lesbian friend who transitioned once, and that was very weird for me, but I never imagined or considered (in my head) myself being in a relationship with an FTM because my primary attraction was to BUTCHES, not men.We talked a lot about that, and I found a comfortable place, but it was always something of an oddity to me.. having known her when she came out as a lesbian, and then having him come out as FTM kinda fucked my head up a bit....

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
Yes this was a cause of some considerable angst at times. I used to worry that I wasn't gay, when I had gone through so much to simply confirm that I was inded gay... I realised eventually that WHOM I chose to be with had NOTHING to do with my sexual identity, infact. This is actually a huge question and one I've addressed elsewhere on this forum but I can't remember where. Perhaps those interested could do a search? LOL It grows tiresome to repeat yourself continuously, y'all.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
I find it rare to find FTMs where I live, and most are excruciatingly young anyways, so no, it would be like being attracted to my son (or someone even younger LOL). Too weird. I find that at my age, I am more attracted to the person than the body, but I am not on the market, so to speak, so I am not looking. A single person would probably answer far more fully. IF I was single however, I would DEFINITELY seek out an FTM, but only if they were at least five years into their transition.

Please do not restrict your posts to answering just these 3 questions as if you have any other thoughts/ advice/ help on this please do not hesitate to post as I really cannot wait for your posts.

:)

[/COLOR]

I would be happy to answer more questions if you have them (it's much easier than anticipating questions).

PS: My husband is in his 13th year since first transitioning hormonally. He has had chest surgery. He rarely uses testosterone now. It's been two years since his last injection.This was not a choice, it was financial circumstances that led to him missing injectons (it costs a lot here in NZ), but it didn't make much of a difference. He still has all the effects of testosterone in spite of the time lapse.

Maybe after ten years things stabilise?

I dunno, what have others found?

[Rainbowchick07]

So...Interesting...I went back and found this post from December when I was new to the site:

I still sorta prefer to date butches and I have yet to enter into a relationship with a TransGuy, but I can say that I find them very attractive. I realized that I had since I was a baby lesbian. I had a huge crush on the first TG that I had met when I was in high school, but had forgotten about it. I think for me, a lot of it has to do with what a lot of other people have said, something about the strength that it takes to follow their true path. There is something that I find really sexy about the depth of the TGs that I have met. There is so much to them. And the reality, as hard and confusing as it was to admit to myself, their deep masculinity and all that implies is very sexy and attractive. (Even though I have zero attraction to bio-men.)


The interesting part of that is now, 5 months later, I am actually in a relationship with a TransGuy. And, oh man is he sexy! But yeah, he hasn't started T, but is thinking about it, but regardless of that, he is an amazing man. There are days when I still sorta struggle with a lot of what Eva mentioned about not only disappearing as a femme, but also as a lesbian. But I spent a long time becoming secure in my identity and finally really accepted the fact that my identity is not based just on who I date. I have always said that love is not based on gender, and I believe that now more than ever.

There is a whole network of SOFFA's that are available to support you as you embark on this journey as well. Both online and real time depending on where you live. Congratulations on your new love...

[MidnightBlueEyes]

You are so welcome Becca. Thank you so much for posting here :) i knwo what you mean......it just kind of happened for me like that too. Not something i expected or planned but it just happened :)

I agree.. I love my Braedon with all my heart and I am so excited to have him in my life... we have agreed to not make any decisions on changes to his FTM status until we are together (we are long distance right now) as I feel it is important for me to be there for Him and work through it together..I am glad to see more people posting as there seems to be little said about this here...


I would be happy to answer more questions if you have them (it's much easier than anticipating questions).

PS: My husband is in his 13th year since first transitioning hormonally. He has had chest surgery. He rarely uses testosterone now. It's been two years since his last injection.This was not a choice, it was financial circumstances that led to him missing injectons (it costs a lot here in NZ), but it didn't make much of a difference. He still has all the effects of testosterone in spite of the time lapse.

Maybe after ten years things stabilise?

I dunno, what have others found?

Annie... thank you so much for your sharing... I am still learning and "wondering" what to think when Braedon decides to go on T how it will affect us... I am not worried at all...It is such a strange thing because He is just so NATURAL to me... I love him with all my heart.... ALL of Him.... I may be PMng ya some time for advice!!


So...Interesting...I went back and found this post from December when I was new to the site:

I still sorta prefer to date butches and I have yet to enter into a relationship with a TransGuy, but I can say that I find them very attractive. I realized that I had since I was a baby lesbian. I had a huge crush on the first TG that I had met when I was in high school, but had forgotten about it. I think for me, a lot of it has to do with what a lot of other people have said, something about the strength that it takes to follow their true path. There is something that I find really sexy about the depth of the TGs that I have met. There is so much to them. And the reality, as hard and confusing as it was to admit to myself, their deep masculinity and all that implies is very sexy and attractive. (Even though I have zero attraction to bio-men.)


The interesting part of that is now, 5 months later, I am actually in a relationship with a TransGuy. And, oh man is he sexy! But yeah, he hasn't started T, but is thinking about it, but regardless of that, he is an amazing man. There are days when I still sorta struggle with a lot of what Eva mentioned about not only disappearing as a femme, but also as a lesbian. But I spent a long time becoming secure in my identity and finally really accepted the fact that my identity is not based just on who I date. I have always said that love is not based on gender, and I believe that now more than ever.

There is a whole network of SOFFA's that are available to support you as you embark on this journey as well. Both online and real time depending on where you live. Congratulations on your new love...



I can so relate to this...I was having a discussion with a gay guy last night and he said "well wouldnt that make you straight?". I dont know how I will feel about that and I guess I am not in a place to explore that yet but I am curious....... I colored the section that I loved in your statement. Especially since Braedon and I havent even had a chance to meet yet I want to be able to grow *WITH* him in this journey... But I also want to get a better understanding so that I can be more educated when we do talk more... Would you mind PM'ng me some of those support groups online? I am not comfortable with attending my local one as I am the president of our LGBT community center and they meet there.... Thanks...

Becca... babygirl to Braedon...

[bit]

Oh my. I have to get to the grocery store before the heavens open up, so I'm posting to get subscribed so I don't lose this thread. I'll be back later with links and thoughts.

*dashes out the door*

[MidnightBlueEyes]

I guess I never answered these although I think I am too new to be able to answer quite like I want to...

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously? I am in love with my Daddy Braedon who happens to be FTM... I didnt go looking for it... It found me...But I am VERY attracted I would say with the masculine side of him that is unlike any Butch I have known... Does that make sense??
2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Personally this is not an issue for me... although Braedon has not started T or anything yet but I know he is curious about it..I will be there for him because I love him and want to walk down this road together with him... Did you start to question whether you were turning straight? Hell no... I believe that the fact that He was a woman first makes him soooo not straight.. He will know what pleases a woman, what feelings a woman has... I am very emotional.... straight men dont understand that but my Braedon does....

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception? No he is not the exception... I find Bo very attractive but I think it is more his personality that attracts me... He is a trip! I havent really "looked" at another FTM as I dont feel the need to but doesnt mean I dont enjoy eye candy from time to time...

Becca....hope that was a start since I am VERY new to this... We have been dating almost 2 months.... I know... quick... but I knew when I met him I loved him....

[MidnightBlueEyes]

Oh my. I have to get to the grocery store before the heavens open up, so I'm posting to get subscribed so I don't lose this thread. I'll be back later with links and thoughts.

*dashes out the door*

Waives at bit... geezzz the heavens are gonna open up there too!?!? Your 5 hours away... its thundering bad here.. Gonna go take a nap then go to dinner with friends... be careful going to the grocery store!! Cant wait to see you guys in 6 days!! Well 7 for you 6 for Pixie dust!!

Becca

[Rainbowchick07]

Feel free to PM me anytime. We are in the very beginning stages of our journey together, but I will answer any questions to the best of my ability. It is also nice just to have someone to talk to, about your fears, things you are excited about, anything...

Here are some links to some sites that I found:

http://www.tgcrossroads.org/resources/list.asp?cat=Support&subcat=SOFFA&state=

http://www.go.to/tfem/

http://www.ftminfo.net/soffa.html

http://www.ftmi.org/

https://www.msu.edu/~phitaumu/transition.html

I found all these sites by doing a search on Google for SOFFA+FTM. There are also quite a few SOFFA threads here on B-F.

Good Luck, and again, feel free to PM me....

[wildindiangoddess]

This is a very interesting thread and I enjoyed reading it. hank you all for your honesty.

I don't consider myself a lesbian. I did many moons ago. I only date very masculine, male identified butches. I enjoy a traditional type of relationship like most straight people have but I also don't consider myself straight. lol

At the same time I'm honestly not sure I could do full ftm. I'm not attracted to men per se however its the essence that attracts me to a butch. A combination of masculine and then something more. its like a third sex to me and I only connect with that. For me it almost seems like a full male transition put them into male space and out of that third sex catagory.

But if I was with a butch, in love, would I support hys desire to transition deeper? I suppose I would. I've often wondered the same questions you posted here and how it would be for me. I was with someone that considered it but decided to live as a male without it. Most of the people I date get called "sir" all the time. If they need it for their own personal journey I completely understand.

[bit]

Okay... we'll see if I can do this without crashing my browser, lol, I just opened every link I wanted so I could make sure they were the threads I remembered. Not every thread is specifically about support or community--some are great for helping a person figure out just who she is. ;)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=5644
Looking for Queer Transensual Femmes

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=643
Looking for my T-Femme sisters *S*

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=21469
Femme VS Woman
This thread starts out with a detailed discussion about Femme Gender Identity; I included it because of the question in this thread about whether or not a Femme with a Transman becomes straight. It's a way to start thinking about who we are and how we define ourselves. *warning's fair, I don't remember if the thread ended in flames or not*

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=15270
TRANSENSUALITY: A sexual orientation?

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=23887
Is Transition the answer?

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=23071
butch/femme and transitioning

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=2159
I used to think I was a Lesbian
This thread is actually more about Stonefemmes than about Transensual Femmes... but there is so much overlap between the two that it seems like we could all find support and food for thought in it.

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=16186
Being the wife of a Transgendered Butch

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=19448
A Question...For the Femmes...About FTM
Another thread to make ya think....

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=20491
How do we transition?

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=1319
Soffa
This was our main thread for a long time, and is the longest-running, with the most input and with the most pages.

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=1836
FTMs Helping Their SOFFAs

[bit]

Wow, didn't mean to shut the thread down!




I would love to hear the thoughts from femmes like myself, who were always attracted to butchs/ TG butches and stone butches but never considered FTMs but who are now attracted to FTMs or who are now in a relationship with an FTM.

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?

Their words. When I came here years ago I read the archives, and there were consistent voices speaking in all the threads that I found myself utterly drawn to. Now mind you, at that time there were no galleries... it was a small website and especially in the archives, all I had to go by were the words in the posts. So I came to admire several people very intensely for the way their minds worked and for how very self-aware they were, and was surprised to find out when I read the then-current posts that they were all transmen!


2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?

Oh yeah. For about three seconds. :cheesy: I was lucky; when I first came to understand this about me, there were many very powerful Femmes leading the way and I learned from them that who I am never depends on who my partner might be or might become. I've clung to that through the years.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?

I find transmen attractive as individuals and also as a category, the same way I find Butches attractive. I am happy to be with either.

[MidnightBlueEyes]

Wow, didn't mean to shut the thread down!



1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?

Their words. When I came here years ago I read the archives, and there were consistent voices speaking in all the threads that I found myself utterly drawn to. Now mind you, at that time there were no galleries... it was a small website and especially in the archives, all I had to go by were the words in the posts. So I came to admire several people very intensely for the way their minds worked and for how very self-aware they were, and was surprised to find out when I read the then-current posts that they were all transmen!


2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?

Oh yeah. For about three seconds. :cheesy: I was lucky; when I first came to understand this about me, there were many very powerful Femmes leading the way and I learned from them that who I am never depends on who my partner might be or might become. I've clung to that through the years.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?

I find transmen attractive as individuals and also as a category, the same way I find Butches attractive. I am happy to be with either.

Nah Cath it seems to come in spirts....I find there are very few threads so I am happy to have this one.... I am not single so the other thread isnt one I can visit...

Becca... sometimes Fiesty babygirl to Braedon...

[Prudence Juris]

Hi Pussycat..... and friends!!

I just want to take a break from my garden and say "hi" I am so happy you are here and sharing. I don't post much, but it is wonderful to read.

Enjoy the day!!

Miss PJ(f)

[MidnightBlueEyes]

Hi Pussycat..... and friends!!

I just want to take a break from my garden and say "hi" I am so happy you are here and sharing. I don't post much, but it is wonderful to read.

Enjoy the day!!

Miss PJ(f)


Hi miss PJ I too love this thread. Braedon is my love and my first FTM and though I didn't start out liking him specifically because he's trans I love that side of Him. I can't wait to get to have him hold me in his arms in person soon.
Becca

[Prudence Juris]

Hello B-F family please excuse the interruption and check out the link to a wonderful opportunity to support B-F even if you aren’t going to this year’s Bash!!!

http://www.butch-femme.com/portal/forums/showthread.php?t=37267

The details of this auction are listed below.
Thanks for your support!

The Great B-F (online) Auction 2009

I'm really excited about this auction, as I've heard from alot of people, and have some fabulous prizes to put up for bids. Thanks so very much to everyone who has donated prizes. A lot of thought has gone into this by everyone involved, and people seem to be really coming together, bound by their love for our online community. file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image001.gif= file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image002.gif


First, a few words about the auction itself:
- Just to be clear: this is NOT in replacement of the Bash Auction that is normally held at the annual bash in October. This is a different event entirely, whose soul purpose is to raise funds for file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image001.gif(but it's okay if we amuse ourselves at the same time, isn't it?) file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image003.gif
- The auction will start as soon as I post the prizes, and will run until Sunday, August 8th at 12AM - that's midnight Saturday - EST. Make sure you calculate daylight savings into the mix!
- You'll make an offer of a donation based on a particular prize, and if you have the highest bid, you will receive that prize from the member who is offering it. You are not "buying" the item per se - you are being given a prize/gift in return for donating. If there are any special considerations- postage not included, minimum bid - I'll make note of that in the listing.
- FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE DONATED PRIZES: Please check the listing and notify me ASAP if anything is not accurate!
- The prizes will be numbered. Please quote the number and specify the prize when bidding or asking for information (or quote if posting) so as to avoid confusion.
- Any changes or updates will be labelled as "update", so you'll know that this is new information.

PLEASE DON'T CONTACT ME BY PM! You may very-well find that my box is full. I've opened an email account just for the auction: cybersuebee@care2.com Please be assured that your name and return address will be held in the strictest confidence. Please include your screen name when you email me, even if I already know you. This l'il ole file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image004.gifis getting hella confused trying to keep so many details in her head! file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image005.gif

Have I forgotten anything? Please let me know!

It will take awhile for me to post everything. They didn't have an I.T. course in the file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image004.gifAcademy, so please bear with me!

And off we go! Hope this will be as much fun for you as it is for me! file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image006.gif

Sue file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/SHARON%7E1.MOO/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_image004.gif

[Old Jet]

Cute thread. I hope you find your answers.

[PussycatGrrl]

Cute thread. I hope you find your answers.

thank you so much OJ. i have found many answers thanks to this thread :)

[PussycatGrrl]

So...Interesting...I went back and found this post from December when I was new to the site:

I still sorta prefer to date butches and I have yet to enter into a relationship with a TransGuy, but I can say that I find them very attractive. I realized that I had since I was a baby lesbian. I had a huge crush on the first TG that I had met when I was in high school, but had forgotten about it. I think for me, a lot of it has to do with what a lot of other people have said, something about the strength that it takes to follow their true path. There is something that I find really sexy about the depth of the TGs that I have met. There is so much to them. And the reality, as hard and confusing as it was to admit to myself, their deep masculinity and all that implies is very sexy and attractive. (Even though I have zero attraction to bio-men.)


The interesting part of that is now, 5 months later, I am actually in a relationship with a TransGuy. And, oh man is he sexy! But yeah, he hasn't started T, but is thinking about it, but regardless of that, he is an amazing man. There are days when I still sorta struggle with a lot of what Eva mentioned about not only disappearing as a femme, but also as a lesbian. But I spent a long time becoming secure in my identity and finally really accepted the fact that my identity is not based just on who I date. I have always said that love is not based on gender, and I believe that now more than ever.

There is a whole network of SOFFA's that are available to support you as you embark on this journey as well. Both online and real time depending on where you live. Congratulations on your new love...



hi Rainbowchick. i love your story and love is definitly not based on gender, thank you. its 4 months since your post. i hopw things are still going great for you both :)

[PussycatGrrl]

Hi Pussycat..... and friends!!

I just want to take a break from my garden and say "hi" I am so happy you are here and sharing. I don't post much, but it is wonderful to read.

Enjoy the day!!

Miss PJ(f)


Thank you so much for visiting PJ. i hope you visit again soon
:)

[DRAYKKO]

Thank you for your post Eva. You have helped me see things in the correct way.....well you have helped me that is for sure. I see what you mean by not wrapping your head round things still. Maybe i never will either but thinsg are going well at the moment. I guess we will see what happens in time.[

I will never id as straight so I am fine there :)

Welcome to the wonderful world of attraction and love and...well...whatever else you want to call it! :)

It's not a matter of seeing "...things in the correct way..." (or incorrect way) but rather just finding what is comfortable for you. In the game of relationships there is no "right" or "wrong" just what "feels right"... for BOTH of you.... :)

Big Daddy Dre---

[PussycatGrrl]

Welcome to the wonderful world of attraction and love and...well...whatever else you want to call it! :)

It's not a matter of seeing "...things in the correct way..." (or incorrect way) but rather just finding what is comfortable for you. In the game of relationships there is no "right" or "wrong" just what "feels right"... for BOTH of you.... :)

Big Daddy Dre---

Oh it is a wonderful world Dre :) Life is a journy for sure and i want to do what feels right. Its a pity too many people dont go where their heart takes them but all i can do is think about where i want to go and let my heart lead me. If anything this has made me understand that :)

[Rainbowchick07]

hi Rainbowchick. i love your story and love is definitly not based on gender, thank you. its 4 months since your post. i hopw things are still going great for you both :)

Thank you. We are still together, and while we have our ups and downs I know deep inside that we have a wonderful future ahead of us.

And how are you doing on your journey a few months later?

[coming home]

1. What attracted you to a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously? The person, not the gender attracted me. Such an enigma, so much charisma. He made me feel special just by walking the same earth.

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? With great difficulty. When we were alone I didn't care about our identities, in the world at large it really hurt to lose my own lesbian identity. Am I answering this question? His masculinity? It was never an issue, which was a surprise. At first I searched for signs of his former female self, but that need faded away as I learned to see the person. His particular type of masculinity became very attractive to me, all-male yet not a man.

Did you start to question whether you were turning straight? It crossed my mind, I'm sure it crossed others as well. Did I care? Not really.

[PussycatGrrl]

Thank you. We are still together, and while we have our ups and downs I know deep inside that we have a wonderful future ahead of us.

And how are you doing on your journey a few months later?

awww thats fantastic news. Good luck in your future. For me, our relationship stalled a little. More from my side because of the long distance but we are still friends and have started to chat again. We will see how things work out but whatever happens i know i am better for everything thats happened and certainly understand myself more now. i am so glad he encouraged me to start this thread too :)

You seem a real cool person too :)

[mistyblue9802200]

< Pops wee head roond door >;)

*Waving* Good Morning Ms Pussycat &
everyone else(f)(k)(c)


Just wanted to wish you all a beautiful wee day:)

*subscribin*



(f)

[PussycatGrrl]

< Pops wee head roond door >;)

*Waving* Good Morning Ms Pussycat &
everyone else(f)(k)(c)


Just wanted to wish you all a beautiful wee day:)

*subscribin*



(f)

hey Misty. Great to see you and thank you for subscribing :)

[PussycatGrrl]

Welcome to the wonderful world of attraction and love and...well...whatever else you want to call it! :)

It's not a matter of seeing "...things in the correct way..." (or incorrect way) but rather just finding what is comfortable for you. In the game of relationships there is no "right" or "wrong" just what "feels right"... for BOTH of you.... :)

Big Daddy Dre---

Thank you Dre........yes its all about attraction and love. You put it so perfectly :)

[Rainbowchick07]

awww thats fantastic news. Good luck in your future. For me, our relationship stalled a little. More from my side because of the long distance but we are still friends and have started to chat again. We will see how things work out but whatever happens i know i am better for everything thats happened and certainly understand myself more now. i am so glad he encouraged me to start this thread too :)

You seem a real cool person too :)
Thanks! You seem like a cool person too!

Yeah, I feel like if the situation were to arise that our relationship didn't work out, I would be forever indebted to Logic for all that I have learned and am still learning about myself and how in relate to the world in regards to this issue. I always believed I was very open minded, and I try to expand my mind everyday, but I also found that my field of reference is very stereotypical when it comes to gender and therefore unintentionally, I can actually be a tad close minded. But now that I am aware of that, I am learning to navigate through it. And I have Logic to thank for that...

Good luck to you in all that you do...

[SyrWalker]

Great thread you've started here grrl. Definitely subscribing.

Syr

[PussycatGrrl]

ThankYou for subscribing Syr. i look forward to seeing more of You around :)


Great thread you've started here grrl. Definitely subscribing.

Syr

[Packin'Boi]

(y) :)... subscribin'...

[always2late]

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
As with all my relationships/attractions, I became attracted to the person first.

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
This was a puzzle for me at first. And then I realized that I need not define myself, nor accept anyone else label. I am attracted to decency, honesty, intelligence, personality, and masculinity. The wrapping paper doesn't matter.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
I am attracted to whoever I am attracted to. :)

Great thread! Got my subscription in.

[PussycatGrrl]

awwww thank you for subscribing and especially for your post always2late. If its one thing i have learnt its to love someone for who they are not what they are :)

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
As with all my relationships/attractions, I became attracted to the person first.

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
This was a puzzle for me at first. And then I realized that I need not define myself, nor accept anyone else label. I am attracted to decency, honesty, intelligence, personality, and masculinity. The wrapping paper doesn't matter.

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
I am attracted to whoever I am attracted to. :)

Great thread! Got my subscription in.

[PussycatGrrl]

Thank you Packin Boi :) Please come back soon ;)
(y) :)... subscribin'...

[softness]

1. What attracted you to FTMs/ or a FTM when before you were never attracted to them previously?
The problem I have with this question is in the assumption is that I wasnt attracted to them previously. FtMs. In fact several of the butches I have dated in the past are now transgendered and one is a FtM. I gravitate to masculinized energy but not in bio form., tho I have dated bio men. (but they leave an aftertaste...like sweet n low) My only challenge was that I didnt know this was an option...just like originally I didnt know butch was an option. I came out during and in a feminist andro dyke geographical and time wise era/area. Once I caught hold of the BF dynamic I never looked back and once I discovered trans and FtMs, they were certainly side by side with butches in my choices, so no, they werent dismissed as not a choice. I am involved with a transman who is moving to FtM. I am also someone who seems to help butches identify and come out as trans during our dating process. My energy is accepting and they seem to feel free to explore this about themselves. They stop being afraid of losing someone by exploring this about themselves...to speak it out loud...

2. How did you get your head around the fact that you are gay and are not attracted to men but they are a man? Did you start to question whether you were turning straight?
I am so not gay. And I am attracted to men, just not bio men, tho I can sleep with them too. Good sex is so much more than who I am with..its about me and how comfortable I feel about myself and how connected I am to the other person...I have never been straight..always been bent (an old fashion term for being gay) and bio men always think they landed the prize when they sleep with me because I am so not like other women...but then FtMs also think they landed a prize but because they see me as someone who appreciates who they are..not who else I have slept with. Now who would YOU rather sleep with if that was the dichotomy? But we arent talking about fucking here. Hell I can fucka piece of plastic..doesnt make me a credit card. Who I fall in love with...now thats the lingo and label I am speaking about. I guess I am a hetero-queer. I am in love with a FtM and we have a heterosexual relationship and I am bent, not straight so that makes me a queer too...

3. If you are in a relationship with that particulay guy, do you find other FTMs attractive or is he the exception?
He isnt the exception...he is the rule. LOL. Ruler, actually. He rules and rocks my world. But do I find other FtMs attractive? Hell yes. And some very masculined male IDd butches too. I am partnered, not blind or dead. I can find appreciation in any form of art..and a handsome FtM or MId butch IS a work of art...god's art. And just because I think its art doesnt mean I want it hanging in my house in place of what/who I have. No one and I mean No One. will interfere with our relationship. I fell in love with HIM...and uniquely, he is not just "a" FtM...he is Mine.

I am 52 and a silver femme..been around the block a few times. Fallen in love with the right people at the right times and the wrong people at the wrong times and the right people at the wrong time and the Wrong people at the right times...

right now, I am in love and it feels right and he feels right with me. I am hoping to live happily ever after....and you cant get that with exceptions, honey. You can only have that with the rule....at least thats my personal opinion...and of course, you have to realize its a rule and not an exception...or not. THATS your real quest here....IMHO

[wildindiangoddess]

Hell I can fucka piece of plastic..doesnt make me a credit card

roflmao! Thats classic !

[BraedonAlexander]

Very well said Softness (y) (f)

[CurlyRedHead]

I just wanted to comment and say this is a great thread. I hope to see more ladies put their responses out. I find alot of women have an issue with the whole label thing. The last few women I have been with have had issues with how they identify. Very complicated subject.

[Rainbowchick07]

...I have never been straight..always been bent (an old fashion term for being gay)

I love this!! Reminds me of what I sometimes tell people when asked if I'm straight - "I'm straight as a rainbow!"

[softness]

and I like yours!


I love this!! Reminds me of what I sometimes tell people when asked if I'm straight - "I'm straight as a rainbow!"