How to Write the Best Personal Ad

The key to finding the Butch or Femme or you dreams on Butch-Femme.com's Free Photo Personals is to make sure that your personal ad is attention-getting, intriging and fun. By reading these questions and statements, hopefully you will be inspired to write the best possible personal ad.

• Read Butch-Femme.com's Guidelines for Personals. Do this before you post an ad so you can be sure that your ad will get posted on the site. You must be an Butch-seeking-a-Femme or a Femme-seeking-a-Butch. All personal ads are subject to rejection or removal if they do not meet our guidelines.
• Write a catchy headline. Make it memorable but don't be boastful. "Saucy Princess seeks Sensitive Pirate for Midnight Raid" tells a lot more about you than "Femme Seeks Butch."
• Post a photo. Want more responses? The easiest way to get noticed is to post a photo on your personal ad. Try to find a picture that shows how you normally look (because that's the person we want to meet!). You will see a link on the left-hand side of the personals home page for adding a photo to your existing ad. The photo for your personal must be in a .jpg or .gif format, set at a reasonable resolution (example: 72 dpi), and sized within 200 by 200 pixels or less. That translates to mean that the photo must be sized to no larger than 2.75 inches in height or width. Otherwise, the photo won't upload to our server.
• Describe yourself and the person you're seeking. What makes you unique? People are more likely to respond to your ad if they are attracted by something you've told them about you. Focus on the positives.
• Show -- don't tell. Instead of saying "I like music, movies and restaurants," offer specific examples. It's more revealing to say you're turned on by "Barry Manilow, Woody Allen flicks, and spicy Mexican food."
• Be creative. Have fun with your ad! That way people will know they can have fun with you. Make your ad stand out by describing your most intriguing feature or your most memorable experience.
• Keep it brief. No one wants to read your life story. Write enough to catch someone's attention. You can share the more personal details later.
• Don't lie! Honesty can prevent disappointment for both you and your potential date. Just remember, you could end up meeting someone who reads your ad, so don't say you're 6'1" if you're really 5'4".
• Double-check your spelling and grammar. People are more likely to take your ad seriously if you've put some thought into it. Use proper punctuation and capitalization. ADS WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS LOOK LIKE SHOUTING. ads written in all lowercase with no punctuation even commas are hard for readers to understand dont you agree

• What was the last movie you rented?
• What gay/lesbian/trans or Butch-Femme events have you attended?
• What was the last movie you saw in the theater?
• Name some of your all-time favorite movies.
• What gay/lesbian/trans or Butch-Femme books have you enjoyed?
• What's your favorite TV show?
• Which TV family would you like to join?
• What is your dream car?
• In the car, do you listen to music or talk radio?
• What is your favorite band or musician?
• What band/musician have you seen most recently in concert?
• What songs or artists put you in the mood?
• Name a few of your top albums.
• Pick: VH1, MTV, BET or PBS Arts Showcase?
• Do you play any instruments?
• Where are you most likely to be caught singing: in the shower, in the car, at a karaoke bar, in a Broadway show?
• What magazines are on your coffee table right now?
• Do you read the articles or just look at the pictures?
• What was the last book you read?
• Name one of your favorite books. Why is it your favorite?
• Who is your favorite writer?
• Do you prefer fiction or non-fiction? Crime, horror, fantasy, or romance?
• Do you like to cook? Are you a good cook?
• Name some of your favorite foods.
• What's your favorite dessert?
• What's your favorite beverage?
• Do you like to eat at gourmet restaurants?
• List some of your favorite types of restaurants.
• Do you enjoy crossword puzzles?
• What is your favorite board game? Why is it your favorite?
• Do you play video games? Which ones?
• What sports do you play? What was your most memorable moment as an athlete?
• What is your favorite sport to watch?
• Describe the best game you ever attended.
• What is your favorite sports team?
• Do you dress in your team colors? With face paint?
• Do you have any unusual hobbies or collections?

• What was your favorite job?
• What is the strangest job you've ever had?
• If you could change careers and do anything you wanted to do, regardless of pay, what would you do? Why?
• How many hours a week do you work?
• Is your position more of a job or a career?
• Do you have lots of friends at work, or is it strictly business?
• How would your co-workers describe you?
• If you were guaranteed success, what would you do?
• If you were in a committed relationship, would that affect the hours you work?

• Where did you go to school?
• What was your major and why did you choose it?
• What was your favorite course/subject in school? Why?
• Would you consider going back for more school?
• Did you do your homework at the last minute or did you plan ahead?

• How important is family to you?
• How many brothers and sisters do you have?
• How often do you visit your family?
• Did you grow up with a large extended family?
• Are you close with your grandparents? Aunts, uncles and cousins?
• What TV family most resembles your childhood?
• What games did you like to play as a child?
• What was the craziest thing you did as a teenager?
• Were you a troublemaker? A rebel? A nerd?
• Do you have any pets? Describe them.

• What celebrity do you most resemble?
• Describe your fashion sense. Is style important to you?
• How important is fitness in your life?
• How many times a week do you exercise?
• Do you prefer to lift weights, take a swim or go to an aerobics class?
• Do you ever wear wrinkled clothes?
• Do your socks always match?
• Do you ever wear underwear with holes?
• Which perfume/cologne do you wear?
• Do you like your date to wear perfume/cologne?
• What's your favorite scent?
• What is your remedy for the common cold?
• How would you help a sick friend feel better?
• Do you like to sunbathe?
• How many times a week do you floss your teeth?
• Does your toilet paper hang over the front or the back of the roll?

• Describe your ideal dream date. Where would you go and what would you do?
• Have you ever written a love letter to someone?
• Do you believe in love at first sight?
• Have you experienced love at first sight?
• How long has it been since your last relationship?
• Do you regret any of your past relationships? Why?
• In a new relationship, do you like to take it slow or do you start with a bang?
• What would you rather have in bed: strawberries, a fluffy pillow, or breakfast?

• How do your closest friends describe you?
• Name one of your favorite activities for a Saturday night.
• Do you tell your friends everything that's going on in your life or are you more guarded?
• Describe your social life. Are you a party person? Or do you like more intimate gatherings?
• What do you say to strike up a conversation at a party?
• Do you circulate at parties or stand in the corner?
• Are you able to enjoy yourself when hosting a party or get-together?

• What kind of Butch or Femme are you? (ie "stone", "soft", "old-school")
• Do you believe in fate?
• Do you believe in revenge?
• Is the glass half full or half empty?
• Do you knock on wood?
• If you could be a superhero, who would you be?
• Which would you rather have named after you: city, constellation, mountain or river?
• Would you rather fly, walk, swim or ride a horse?
• Do you run from the camera or jump in front of the photographer?
• How many days a week do you make your bed?
• Are you a gossip? A flirt?
• Do you ever lose your keys? How often?
• When you're lost, do you ask for directions?
• Do you think you learn from your mistakes?
• Have you ever been arrested?
• Do you like to attend high-energy dance clubs or mellow jazz clubs?
• If you could have dinner with a famous person, who would it be?
• What celebrity would you most like to date?
• What percentage of the time are you comfortable with yourself?
• What percentage of the time are you on time?
• Do you ever talk to yourself out loud? What do you talk about?
• What do you do when a phone solicitor calls?
• What's your preferred method of communication: phone, instant messaging or email?
• Do you flirt with waiters/waitresses or retail clerks?
• Have you ever taken candy from a baby?
• Do you find kids cute or obnoxious?
• Do you have children? Do you want children?
• Do you usually assume the best or the worst in someone?

• Describe three events in your life -- two fictional and one factual -- and ask the people who respond to your ad to guess which one is true.
• What is your most embarrassing moment (that you'd actually be willing to tell someone)?
• Describe your wildest Halloween costume.
• What are your three main goals in life?
• Are you into astrology? If yes, how does it affect your life?
• Admit your favorite guilty pleasure.
• Describe the best vacation you've taken.
• Do you notice when people use poor grammar?
• In the past, why have you broken a promise?
• What's your favorite flower?
• Do you believe in fairies? Have you been to the Land of Make-Believe?
• Would you rather be a pirate or a prince? Peter Pan or Captain Hook?
• Who's your favorite, Big Bird or Kermit the Frog?

Don't copy these example ads because then everyone's ad will say the same thing! Just use them as a reference.

Wacky single Femme seeks fun Butch for wild romance
Hello! I'm a 29-year-old, never-married, fun-loving Femme who lives and works (very hard) in the San Francisco Bay Area. I'm 5'7", 130 pounds with black hair, blue eyes, and bright green-painted toenails. I'm a huge music fan and love the Dave Matthews Band, Cake, Tom Petty, Susan Tedeschi, and the Gypsy Kings. I love all types of movies; my all-time favorites include "Raging Bull" and "It's a Wonderful Life." I also enjoy curling up with a good book, and right now I'm in the middle of "The Corrections." I want to learn to play the guitar, speak Spanish, and snowboard with grace. What I value most in life is my rather large family, the Earth, and my hobby -- photography. One day, I hope to become the coolest, sexiest mom with a van full of kids you've ever seen. If you love mushroom ravioli, romantic nights by a fire, and spring camping trips, please reply! I'm seeking an honest Butch between ages 27 and 35 who is taller than me, wants kids, likes to go hiking, lives nearby, and can appreciate a Femme lesbian who's often been called "refreshing." Men who enjoy karaoke bars and foreign films earn extra points.

Good luck and happy hunting!